My mother always told me The Purpose of Marriage…
is to find peace, love, companionship, friendship with another, so you can grow together in strength & trust, enjoy each other’s aliveness, have adventures, raise a family… heal & elevate your Spirit & Soul in the process” - Sophia
This lesson took me a lifetime to learn.
I used to believe romantic relationships and love were the same. I equated marriage to being on an emotional rollercoaster, high octane, high drama and chaos, uncertainty, conflict and “I am right” obsessional, controlling energy.
A rinse and repeat cycle of melodrama, madness and tension which seemed fun in the early days and now, with children, overwhelmingly difficult and challenging on a mental, emotional, physiological, relational and spiritual level.
HOW WRONG WAS I?
If you’re starting to feel like there’s no solution for your marriage, your relationship, or your single life…
If everything you’ve ever been taught, like me, tells you that
Love is hard
Love is a tragedy waiting to happen
Love is earned
Love is being inauthentic
Love is waiting, anxious
Love is chasing another for validation, acceptance and belonging
Love is only for certain women who look and act in certain ways…
I’m here for you.
& I’m here to tell you that being in a good relationship with a loving present partner is team work and regulating each other’s nervous systems through using skills & guess what… these can be learned.
…and once you do you’ll start to experience love.. deep mature love… love with knowledge and acceptance … YOU deserve this.
When I was growing up I knew I wanted a relationship that was fun and loving… I wanted to feel part of a harmonious team…
You see, as a child, I never saw happiness in any of the marriages in my world.
Those marriages were all about “function”. They were dysfunctionally functional.
Everyone around me, in my community, had had arranged marriages and “love” would grow and crazily it did.
Marriage is serious business and in my culture it’s the ultimate responsibility for parents. Suitors were disregarded if they didn't fit into the family frequency … parents looked at every aspect from dowry, virginity, malleability, medical, financial, educational perspective before deciding whether the proposal was rejected or accepted.
On one level this was truly beautiful but functionality, compromise and sacrifice killed romance.
In my teens I started to notice the lack of affection, the simmering resentments and the unhappiness but this was not enough of a reason to break the family home… so people sat together in misery… and this ideology of relationships was passed down to their children and this became their template …
So I truly felt love was trauma and relationships were an uphill battle where the idea of “wanting love’ felt foreign.
This message sat in my subconscious, manifesting a pattern of destructive behaviour and attracting toxic people into my life.
Together we were a hurricane… wreaking havoc in our wake and causing deep sorrow and pain to each other in the process and to those around us.
I didn’t trust anyone or their words but the truth of the matter was, I didn’t trust myself to receive love and feel worthy of it.
I was so afraid to open my heart, in case I got hurt SO I created the environment that led to anguish and pain.
I was stuck in a holding pattern unable to break the loop until…
I realised that I was the common denominator in my pain… I wanted love and I did every thing in my power to repel it, push it away and sabotage it… I was instrumental in the creation of the pain… and my relationship suffered because of it.
If this is you and you want to change the narrative of your story… You want to rewrite your relationship story… so you can finally let go… be vulnerable, authentic, safe, intimate, and connected then click this button and book a session.
CLIENT TESTIMONIAL
I have been able to regulate myself in my relationship thanks to the wonderful sessions with Sophie. I take my marriage seriously and have an awareness now of how I impact my world. It’s been a game changer. - Justina
Book a Discovery Call.
In this 20 minute call you will learn how you can have create powerfully happy relationships with simple shifts. Rewriting your own story and building the deep connection with another takes invaluable skill. Once you learn them … your life will be infused with love.
There’s no time to waste. Book your 20 mins call with me today so you can discover the path to feeling happy in your relationship.